Three old men are sitting on the porch of a retirement home. The first says:
“Fellas, I got real problems. I’m seventy years old. Every morning at seven o’clock I get up and I try to urinate. All day long I try to urinate. They give me all kinds of medicine but nothing helps.”
The second old man says:
“You think you have problems. I’m eighty years old. Every morning at 8:00 I get up and try to move my bowels. I try all day long. They give me all kinds of stuff but nothing helps.”
Finally the third old man speaks up:
“Fellas: I’m ninety years old. Every morning at 7:00 sharp I urinate. Every morning at 8:00 I move my bowels. Every morning at 9:00 sharp I wake up.”
Vocabulary Help
- porch – varanda
- retirement home – asilo
- get up – levantar
- try – tentar
- kind – tipo
- medicine – remédio
- bowels – intestinos
- stuff – coisas
- sharp – em ponto (afiado)
- wake up – acordar
